What the f*#% am I doing?

Alright, it's time to shape the brand I wish to use in this world. I have a goal to be a top broadcast journalist, and in order to see it through some changes have to be made. Change has always been a fearful step for me. I like the safe, and prefer the usual. However, I think they define the safe plan as insanity, for I can never expect to advance if I'm content with sitting still.

For a little bit of motivation, I turned to a special edition of Robert Greene's laws of power. The 50th Law only contains lessons on fearlessness, and ta-da! I need to be fearless. Let's start with Lesson 1 ::See Things for What They Are — Intense Realism::
Reality can be rather harsh. Your days are
numbered. It takes constant effort to carve a
place for yourself in this ruthlessly competitive
world and hold on to it. People can be
treacherous. They bring endless battles into
your life.

Your task is to resist the temptation to wish it
were all different; instead you must fearlessly
accept these circumstances, even embrace them.
By focusing your attention on what is going on
around you, you will gain a sharp appreciation
for what makes some people advance and others
fall behind. By seeing through people’s
manipulations, you can turn them around. The
firmer your grasp on reality, the more power
you will have to alter it for your purposes.

The intense reality of things is I've got a long way to go to build my brand and I'm certainly scared of failing. So I'm biting off one step at a time.

1. My name is Archel. This doesn't have to be confusing, especially since I don't really have a fan base, but more of a support team. Shelby was easier for people to remember, spell, like. When I want to command the world to know me, you have to actually know me. I've got so much heritage in my name, and honestly who do you trust more to deliver your news and advice? I fear that the name change thing is kind of weird. However, I kinda have to do it now, because I'm applying for jobs now.
   
2. My professional twitter page is @itsArchel. If you follow the fun page, you can see why I don't want to trace it back to me. I've done the fun thing for a while now, but let's be real, I'm not getting any jobs having fun.
3. My facebook fan page is coming up. It's a "public figure" page. Here's the kicker: that's what I want to be. I want to be in the public eye. I want to give my point of view. I want to deliver facts. I want people to know me, to love me, to feel like they're my friend, even if the only things they know are the things they read or hear. If we never ever grab lunch, I still want people to think I'm their girl. I want people to love to hate me. I want them to say "I can't believe she said that?!?" at their dinner tables. If you see things for what they are, I want to give you honest things to see. My fan page will launch once my resume reel is where I want it to be.
   
4. I want Liberia to be the Paris of West Africa, even if my contribution is simply my living room cocktail parties. I still haven't decided on a name for the dress selling aspect of my brand yet, but I know it will have something to do with the adinkra symbol "nsaa" which is a type of hand woven cloth that stands for "excellence, genuineness, and authenticity." Insert ideas here.
   
5. I'm going to have to change the name of my blog, and I suppose hire a real team to construct my page for me. I think of this as my baby. I pour out my innermost, confusing feelings right here, and y'all listen and text me, email me, tweet me, whatever, just to let me know you're watching me walk in progress. But I can't be Shelby for much longer. I've got to grow up, and be realistic about a lot of things if I want to turn my mark into a bang. Hell yes I'm full of fear, but I'm focusing my attention on what's going on around me, screaming on the inside, and pushing forward throughout.
   

I suppose everyone goes through this "What the f*#% am I doing?" feeling when they're near graduation. I was raised knowing I would go to college and get a good job after, but then what? How do I know where to go to truly live my dreams? What are my true limitations? Do I have a right to these fears? Since today was just lesson 1, I won't try to tackle everything at once. My task is to resist temptation to wish it were all different; instead I must fearlessly accept these circumstances, even embrace them. More power to me, I'm moving right along.